True story

My best friend's sister's boyfriend's brother's girlfriend heard from this guy who knows this kid who's going with the girl whose uncle had this happen to him. We will call him Frank. So Frank has a wife, and for the purposes of this story we will call her Janeen.

Last Saturday was Janeen's best friend's birthday. Janeen's best friend, Susan, wanted to have a crazy girl's night out for her birthday. Frank thought this wasn't a big deal and he agreed, glad to have some time alone. Maybe he would have some beers. Who knows, but he was going to enjoy his evening at home alone.

I'm guessing Janeen got herself all dolled up, and kissed her husband good night, telling him not to wait up. Frank probably ordered a pizza and sat down to enjoy his night, which I am sure he did.

Around 3:15 Sunday morning, Frank, fast asleep in bed wakes up to hear Janeen stumble into the house. Even though it is late, and she is clearly lit, Frank is glad Janeen is home and drifts back off to sleep not letting Janeen know that he even woke up.

Frank wakes up bright and early the next morning, and it is a beautiful sunny day. I'm betting Frank is feeling good about himself. He's glad his wife blew off some steam the night before. Frank goes outside to get the morning paper and saunters to the end of the driveway. I imagine he was wearing his robe, maybe drinking a mug of coffee. He bends over to pick up the paper, which is a little difficult with one hand holding the mug because the Sunday edition is always a biggie, but Frank manages.

As he is walking back up the drive Frank sees the family Volvo, which Janeen drove last night. With the condition she came home in last night, he is glad it all in one piece.

But something is wrong!... What?... What's that on the hood?...