True Story

A small zoo in Tennessee obtained a very rare species of gorilla. Within recent weeks the gorilla, a female, became very difficult to handle. Upon examination, the veterinarian determined the problem was that the gorilla was in heat. To compound the problem, no male gorilla available for breeding purposes.

The Zoo Keeper could come up with only one solution to the problem - Bobby Lee Walton, a redneck part-time worker responsible for cleaning the animal cages. Bobby Lee was approached with a proposition. Would he be willing to mate with the gorilla for $500.00?

Bobby Lee showed some interest, but said he would have to think the matter over carefully. The following day, he announced that he would accept their offer, but only under four conditions:

1. "First", Bobby Lee said, "I ain't gonna kiss her on the lips."The Keeper quickly agreed to this condition

2. "Second", he said, "You can't never tell no one about this."The Keeper again readily agreed to this condition.

3. "Third", Bobby Lee said, "I want all the children raised Southern Baptist." Once again it was agreed.

4. And last, Bobby Lee said "I'll need another week to come up with the $500.00

Alright, I lied. This wasn't a true story, sorry for lying.